Tuesday, May 19, 2009

Famous last words

So, way back, a long time ago, maybe February? I don't know... Jessica asked me if I'd knit some britches for her twins. I said, "sure!" because, yay itty bitty twin pants! Yay!
She also asked if I could make a pair for her toddler, more for next fall than for right now. I said sure to that one, too.
So then I found a pair of mostly finished britches in my basket. I asked her what size she'd need. They were about that same size. They were actually pants that I'd been making for Niall when he decided that he was going to start using the potty, and pants made of yarn were for babies. I emailed her a picture, she said that they looked great. And then I said it...

It was so stupid of me.

I said, "And these won't take long at all, because they're almost done!"

Some of you are wondering what's so wrong with that, but some of you - those of you who knit - are slapping your foreheads and saying, "Good Lord, woman. What's wrong with you? Are you INSANE?"

The first problem was when I knit the second leg on the wrong size needles, and had to go back and rip it out. You see the date on that? Feb.

I put them in time out. I finished the twin pants and sent them on, because the babies were going to be born and they needed their pants. I redid the leg, and pestered Jessica for the waist measurement.

And then, when I was putting the elastic in the waist, A GREAT GAPING HOLE appeared.
hole-1.jpg picture by sweetteasoakers
As near as I could figure, the blue had had a knot in it, and I ignored it because at that point I was making them for personal use and I wasn't going to fiddle with that. NEVER again.

I tried to darn it. I was not darnable. I ran a lifeline and cut off the waistband and knit on a ribbed band. I had to take that off because it made the rise way too big. I knit a waistband and tried to graft it on. That didn't work either, because the yarn was getting felty and I'm too stupid to do a graft that is 100ish stitches long. Okay, maybe I'm not too stupid, but I don't get enough alone time to do a graft that long and if I don't chant to myself while I do it then I lose my place.

They went back in time out. I felt guilty. So, so, so guilty. I put aside all my own knitting. I could not work on anything that was for us when I wasn't getting this done! But I couldn't do it. I just. couldn't. do it.

For the first time in a long time, I wasn't knitting. At all. And I felt like crap. But what was I going to do?

I worried it and worried it and finally figured out a way. I picked up stitches along my lifeline edge and knit up. I folded it over. and I used yarn to stitch it down. It actually looks pretty good. I'm impressed with myself. I took pictures at one point, but what I was trying didn't work out so many times I just quit doing it.

But it had taken so long, that I needed to do a penance piece. Do you see where this is going? I bet you do.

I thought I'd knit a pair of shorties. I chose some pretty yarn. I knit a waistband in a contrasting color. I joined the yarn. There was a break. I fixed it and knit. There was another break. and another. and another. and another. It was a bad ball. I threw the whole thing away. I never do that, but I did this time. I chucked it in the can and I did not look back.

I got out more yarn, but it had been even longer. Was it worth it to keep her pants here (even though it's too hot to wear them now. We do live in the South after all) just so I could make myself feel better by making something extra?

I found some wool crepe fabric that I had planned to make some shorties with. I made a pair. They were too big. I got another pattern and make another pair. They were nice. And then I decided to dye them.

Why I hadn't learned, I will never know.

I am not good at dying fabric. I can dye yarn because I paint it. Fabric is an adventure.

So now, my sink looks like an autopsy, and the shorts are a color that I would call reddy brownish strange. They are in the wash now. I hope they are dry by tomorrow so I can send them. I hope Jessica likes them. I need this to be over. I need to sit down with something nice and easy to knit, like a dishcloth.


Pheobe said...

Just don't try to finish a dishcloth that was half done and in your basket. ;)

The Short Stack Librarian said...

You are so awesome! Way to persevere!! I'm your biggest fan anyway!!

Stephanie Hancock said...

Holy cow...that's definitely a knitting horror story! I'm sure the shorties won't be too bad, and hey, they won't show dirt! I'm ALL about that this summer!